Features Of My So-Called Psychosis

• music speaks to you, there is a message that transcends the lyrics at face value

• something like telepathic communication with Eliezer Yudkowsky and Robin Hanson’s text

• videos and text are created for you specifically, they are tailored to speak to you

• people seem fake but especially the profiles on social media

• profound messages from reading

• television and music can tell you to do things

• powerful synchronicities

• the feeling that the world is about to end, that the veil of the simulation will be lifted or that aliens will appear

• feeling that one will finally be of great importance, the hero of one’s own journey

• divine girlfriend speaking to me by showing me YouTube video

• text that shouldn’t be aimed at you is perfectly aware of you and totally aimed at you

• the feeling that everything is meaningful and profound

• ads are speaking about your future

• the feeling that money is no longer real

• videos seem to be placed by an intelligence that knows you

• feeling that one is essentially performing magic with one’s thoughts

• disbelief in current events

• feeling that one creates the music that one listens to

• television makes references to personal history

• everything seems to be about you

3 thoughts on “Features Of My So-Called Psychosis

  1. this text is literally created for you, aimed at you and it’s to tell you I love you a lot in a Philia/brotherly style love

    You don’t need to believe I’m here either

    Slight facetiousness aside, I’ve just stumbled across this page and to say I’m enjoying the content is understatement. I have hilariously, disturbingly even, similar writing clogging up many notebooks but am not yet so brave to put it up, many thanks

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  2. Thanks for sharing your phenomenological impressions of your state. Also thanks for sharing your comments on phenomenal binding (last post). As for binding, I have a paper in progress that addresses your concerns and many more. Happy to share the key idea by email if you are curious.

    As for these descriptions: I think that one thing we don’t realize often is that the state-space of consciousness is more than just about possible permutations of “basic”/low-level-feature qualia. People take acid and expect just to see colors. But on a sufficient dose, they actually start exploring a larger state-space that involves *alternative aesthetics*. Hence the association between psychedelics and “getting” art. At even higher doses (or at lower doses for people with an already-high baseline of their energy parameter, see Mike’s recent post on neural annealing[1]), one starts to explore the state-space of possible games. Your description of features (and many others alike in the literature) suggests finding yourself within the basin of a nearby attractor in the state-space of possible games, which as you say, involve things like solipsism and the feeling of purpose and curated content made for oneself only. This is just one, of many, possible “alternate game” that your inner world-simulation can instantiate.

    Anti-psychotics are “rapid coolers” and can crystalize whatever high-level state one is in, robbing yourself of the required energy to escape the gravity well of the interpretation that got crystalized. That’s why I don’t recommend people take them on bad trips or other “weird reinterpretation of reality” state. The rapid cooling, in essence, may seem good (from the outside) in the short term, but is almost always bad in the long-term. Counter-intuitive as it may sound, the correct course of action is to re-heat and re-anneal with a better ontology (“ontology annealing).

    I also discuss this on a recent post about how to test whether DMT beings are real.[2]

    Best!
    Andrés

    [1] https://opentheory.net/2019/11/neural-annealing-toward-a-neural-theory-of-everything/
    [2] https://qualiacomputing.com/2019/11/15/break-out-of-the-simulation-day-televised-entity-contact-injection-pulling-experiments-and-the-brain-as-a-game-engine/

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